SCARF - reduce stress and anxiety with a coaching model based on neuroscience.

You know this feeling...

• When the project doesn't grow in the way that you expect.

• When you are stressed with future bills that you need to pay.

• When there is no clarity about how everything is gonna be.

You are doing your best.

Buying courses and spending tons of time trying to figure out your project.

But…

• When you aren't making any money, you are stressed about how to make them.

• When you start making money. You are stressed about not going broke again.

This endless cycle eats your energy and affects your daily actions. And the more you think about it, the worse it becomes.

Sometimes, this overthinking process can paralyze the whole day. It affects your mind, body, and emotions.

And when someone approaches you with a solution like “Just do a breath practice...” Or “Maybe you should start meditating.”

You want to kick them with their advice and scream.

I've been there... I know exactly how it feels. I can still be in that state from time to time. But now I know that there is a scientific solution that can make you get out of that state pretty easily.

First, try to understand that you can't think about a solution when you are anxious and stressed.

The main mistake of the majority of people is when they have a big problem that stresses them out: They are focused 100% on the problem.

They get used to the mindset that the more they think about the problem, the more details they will know - easier it will be to have an insight and solve it.

In most cases, it's not a good idea.

When you are stressed and focused on a problem, your brain is in a "threat state" - in survival mode... And there is no time or energy to explore new solutions in this state.

So, if you think you will get an amazing idea for your problem when you are anxious and stressed. Perhaps it isn't going to happen.

The first step is to change your internal state and get out of threat mode. This is why most of the insights come to us when we are:

• Doing something else (not focused on a problem).

• Calm and in a good mood.

• Not thinking directly about the problem.

There is a reason why ideas come to people in the shower or during a walk in nature... Today, it's backed by science.

So, how can you practically get out of the threat state and be open to new solutions and ideas?

Say hello to the SCARF Model, developed in 2008 by Dr. David Rock:

In his paper "SCARF: A Brain-Based Model for Collaborating With and Influencing Others."

SCARF stands for the five key "domains" that influence our behavior in social situations. These are:

1. Status: How much we matter to others and how they see us.

2. Certainty: Being able to guess what might happen in the future.

3. Autonomy: Feeling like we have control over what's happening.

4. Relatedness: Feeling safe and comfortable with the people around us.

5. Fairness: Thinking that things are balanced and equal between people.

Let's dive deeper and see how you can use SCARF to feel less stress in your solopreneurship journey:

#1 Status - How much we matter to others and how they see us.

Ask yourself: "What are some achievements in my life that I'm proud of?

Write down your achievements since you were born. Recognize that you accomplished things in your life.

Acknowledging your progress and seeing it written in front of you can boost your confidence, remind you of your capabilities, and increase a feeling of "status".

#2 Certainty - Being able to guess what might happen in the future.

Ask yourself: "What tasks or situations cause the most stress due to uncertainty?

Identify these tasks and break them down into smaller steps.

Don't just write, "I want to make 10K per month." Create a clear plan with specific actions you can take. You can't predict 100% of your future income. But you can be more certain about your actions.

Having a structured plan can reduce uncertainty and give you a sense of control.

#3 Autonomy - Feeling like we have control over what's happening.

Ask yourself: "In which areas of my business or life do I want more control?" You can't control everything. But you can become better at controlling yourself.

Make a list of tasks or decisions you want to take charge of. Implementing that can give you more autonomy over these aspects.

#4 Relatedness - Feeling safe and comfortable with the people around us.

Ask yourself: "Do I feel isolated or disconnected from others in my field?"

Connect with other solopreneurs like you. Try networking events or engage in online communities to share experiences and gain insights.

Connecting with others who understand your journey can help you feel less isolated and provide valuable perspectives to overcome challenges.

#5 Fairness - Thinking that things are balanced and equal between people.

Ask yourself: "Am I comparing my progress to others and feeling that things are unfair?"

The solution to stopping comparing is to focus on your own results. Track your achievements better and celebrate them. This can build a fair sense of progress.

Also, it’s better to limit exposure to comparison triggers, like social media.

SCARF model can help you get out of stressful mode and be open to new insights and solutions that are already inside of you.

Insights that you so need for your growth and making your project bigger and better.

Take care,

Alex